I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
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