Got a toothbrush?
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Actions speak louder than pants.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize