I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka?
Forever.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize