until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize