Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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