Texts From Last Night

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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes

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  (540): I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes http://tfl.nu/2t0p
  Replies (15) Good night (571) Bad night (916) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  god, a vagina is an amazing trump card

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  (775): god, a vagina is an amazing trump card http://tfl.nu/iuci
  Replies (6) Good night (3493) Bad night (413) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles

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  (215): he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles http://tfl.nu/ya5r
  Replies (46) Good night (17387) Bad night (1444) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off

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  (215): the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off http://tfl.nu/gmrh
  Replies (17) Good night (5426) Bad night (1182) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...

  (1-203): View more from Connecticut

  your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen

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  (203): he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible... (1-203): your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen http://tfl.nu/mgfl
  Replies (20) Good night (5387) Bad night (975) Order T-Shirt
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?

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  (765): So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night? http://tfl.nu/0nca
  Replies (16) Good night (4887) Bad night (1465) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..

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  (615): it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex.. http://tfl.nu/6q5t
  Replies (14) Good night (922) Bad night (3110) Order T-Shirt
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  (850): View more from Florida

  HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.

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  (850): HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF. http://tfl.nu/8qce
  Replies (12) Good night (986) Bad night (2645) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt

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  (630): I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt http://tfl.nu/jrki
  Replies (9) Good night (2835) Bad night (570) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.

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  (512): Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here. http://tfl.nu/r3kt
  Replies (14) Good night (3474) Bad night (734) Order T-Shirt
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.

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  (636): I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college. http://tfl.nu/p6pv
  Replies (5) Good night (1626) Bad night (751)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed

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  (210): BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed http://tfl.nu/opf8
  Replies (6) Good night (1449) Bad night (508) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.

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  (303): I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college. http://tfl.nu/snfw
  Replies (3) Good night (3702) Bad night (491)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches

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  (828): i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches http://tfl.nu/n6i5
  Replies (4) Good night (1886) Bad night (520) Order T-Shirt
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  (801): View more from Utah

  P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.

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  (801): P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play. http://tfl.nu/s3w0
  Replies (10) Good night (2135) Bad night (460) Order T-Shirt

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