my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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