McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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