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So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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