hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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