Ambien. No doubt about it.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
His nipple licking is glorious
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