he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
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