Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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