So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
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