where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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