I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize