She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Will exercising make me less horny?
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