I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Randomize