I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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