No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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