There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
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