fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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