At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize