is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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