every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
We have started to decorate penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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