Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize