k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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