i can't believe i had my finger in that
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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