I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
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He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
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Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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