Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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