It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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