Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Randomize