Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
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