3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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