All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
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