I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it because I queefed?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
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