We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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