idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Your cock deserves a montage
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize