Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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