So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
No stitches, just platelets and will power
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize