There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize