dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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