If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
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I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
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If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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