i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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