You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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