I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
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I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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