I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize