did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
What changed your mind?
Being sober
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize