Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Randomize