Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
there was a trapeze. enough said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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